Thursday, October 29, 2009

Truly Malaysian

Got this from an email.. It was hilarious to think that we are what we are... There's no way we can ever change that..

Beats me where they got their sources from..

This is Malaysia - What A True Malaysian Should Know

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS :Ajinomoto

NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD :Maggi Mee

NATIONAL BREAKFAST :Nasi Lemak

NATIONAL LUNCH :Nasi Ayam

NATIONAL SUPPER :Roti Canai & Teh Tarik

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE :Traffic Jam

NATIONAL CONDOM :None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying condoms.So they rushed into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest pack, any pack,pay and leave before the cashier can even blink an eye.

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION :Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK :Stout. Many Malaysian men swear by it. But then after a few pints theystart swearing at everything.

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN) :Food Poisoning

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN) :Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX :Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep,mother-in-law around, earlyappointment, food not digested yet, aircond not cold enough, aircond toocold, nail polish not dry yet, forgot to take the pill, sleepy, stomachcramps, period, haven't remove make-up, haven't shower, no water supply,going to watch 'Santa Barbara', depress, no mood, etc...

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX :None. Malaysian men never refuse sex.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA :Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you are all 'driedup'.

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES :Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon- Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR NAUSEA :Moh Fah Kor.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES) :Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES) :The sight of a police road block.

NATIONAL RICE COOKER :NATIONAL Rice Cooker

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP :Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME :Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

NATIONAL ANSWER FOR 'WHERE ARE YOU' ? :- on the way.

NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE :- 10 minutes

NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE :Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naik ler... inclusivechicken meat?

NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE :Still cheaper than other country la....

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM :there was accident on the other side of the road.. of course must slowdown and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh lah!

NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION :'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'

NATIONAL REASON FOR COLLAPSED BUILDINGS & LEAKY PARLIAMENT ROOFS :An act of God. Definitely nothing to with greased palms and poorquality control. Nope, none whatsoever.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR IRRESPONSIBLE POLITICAL STATEMENTS :None. We were misquoted.

NATIONAL MINISTERIAL REASON FOR INCREASING TOLL RATES :Orang cakap mau naik mesti mau naik lah! Lu ingat ini jalan saya punyabapak punya kah?!

NATIONAL REASON FOR HAVING BIG ONION DOMES ON TAXPAYER FUNDED PUBLICBUILDINGS :Dunno. It's not as if we're anywhere near the middle east.

NATIONAL REASON FOR SPURNING BAILOUT PACKAGES FROM FOREIGN CARCOMPANIES :We're about to unveil another badly designed low budget car, which,coupled with our notorious customer service and corporate mismanagement,will see us bankrupt againwithin the next 5 years. And so we have absolutely no need for theGermans and their silly car-making and market-positioning knowhow, thankyou very much.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT EVER QUEUE) :Everybody doing what lah.......

NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE :Relax ler... government will give discount one of these days

NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION) :Give them minum kopi lar...

No comments:

Post a Comment

You shouted: